[The back rub helps a lot. That, combined with Kara's reassurance lets him calm down and release the tension in his body. He visibly sinks a little bit.]
Same here. I told my brother Barrett it feels like I won the lottery after connecting with you at the dunk tank.
[A little anecdote to further affirm that he isn't ashamed at all.]
I do want to tell Lucas while you're here, though. I was thinking...maybe having you there with me would help. Just so he doesn't think I'm being delusional.
[...]
If I said I had an online girlfriend he would have dismissed it outright. I know him.
[A bashful little chuckle. He really does believe that, though. Of course, he used an incomprehensible analogy about rolling SSRs first and still likes that better, but this works too.
He lifts his head when Kara mentions the gift.]
Your...? Oh! I'm so sorry, I totally forgot about it!
[He reaches into his pocket to retrieve the little package. He looks at her with an excited smile before going ahead and opening it.]
No, it's okay! Honestly, it's...kind of embarrassing, but I hope you like it.
[ And what Levi sees is a mixtape! It's a CD with a track list written on it in pink sharpie. There's also his name written on it at the top in purple.
Finally, there's a little signature at the bottom: A heart, and her name. ]
I... I'm kind of shy sometimes, so if you ever find yourself doubting how I feel, listen to this.
[A mixtape... His eyes brighten and smile widens big time. Wow! He's always wanted to share something like this with someone, so to have one given to him makes him so happy.]
Kara, this is amazing! I love stuff like this. Thank you!!
[He starts to scan the track list.]
Heh, that's hard to imagine, though. You being shy, I mean.
[ She can't help but bring her hand up to hide her face a little. She was so nervous about giving this to him, that hearing his approval makes her both relieved and excited for him to listen to it. ]
G-good! I was worried it'd be kind of lame... Do you know any of the songs on it?
And I'm kind of shy about this stuff, yeah. [ ... ] I'm not used to being so vulnerable.
[Levi usually finds normie love playlists to be hella lame.
...but now that he's in a relationship and receiving one made for him, he wonders if he only thought that because he was single and bitter about it. After all, he was convinced he'd never get something like this.]
Mmm... [He reviews the tracks.] I recognize some of the artists, but not the songs. Oh, I do think I heard "Call Me Maybe" once or twice, since you couldn't escape that song when it was mega popular. I never paid much attention to the lyrics aside from the chorus, though, so I'm looking forward to listening in another light.
[He almost continues his TL;DR, but Kara mentions being vulnerable and he can't help but pump the brakes on his playlist review.]
...
Is that why one of the songs is called "Terrified"?
[ She laces their fingers together when he takes her hand. It's becoming easier and easier for her to do so, especially after he says things like that. ]
I won't, either. I don't want to do that to you.
[ She might have, a couple of weeks ago, to someone else. Thankfully, Levi's helped her realize a few things about how flawed her way of thinking is. ]
If you ever want to talk about it, I'm here to listen, especially since I think there's a lot we don't know about each other, still. ... It'd be nice to learn as much about you as I can.
The air around Levi shifts. His kneejerk reaction is reluctance. He never wants to talk about this stuff, and he especially doesn't want to dump all his baggage on Kara. Still, he can't just not acknowledge her offer. It's coming from a good place, and she's right about how they still have a lot to learn about one another.
Though his eyes cloud over with something akin to brooding as he considers this, he's stroking his thumb against Kara's hand in the process.]
Maybe...not now. I don't wanna bring the mood down when you just got here.
[He pulls out of his temporary funk to smile at Kara's warm kiss.]
I'd like that a lot.
[Letting go of her hand for the time being, he shifts so he can lie back and prop himself up against the guest room bed's many pillows. Kara's welcome to join him however she likes.
Once they're situated, though, Levi murmurs:]
Thanks for being willing to listen once the time's right.
[ She joins him and lies down next to him, rolls onto her side so she's facing him. She gets in close, just wanting to be in his orbit more than anything else...and she nods when he thanks her. ]
Yeah, of course. I know you'll do the same for me, too.
[ Kara offers him a gentle smile in an attempt to lift his spirits a little. ]
You told me that you wanted me to be honest with you, through the good and bad, right? Then the same goes for you, too. Even if we, I don't know, get into a fight or something... I don't want to shut you out.
[Once Kara gets settled, Levi lifts an arm to put around her shoulder. When he tips his head to see her smiling at him, he can't help but smile a little too. It's calming, especially in the presence of heavy but necessary conversation.]
I know it's wishful thinking to wanna believe we won't get into a fight, but...yeah, I think it's best to have this talk in case it does happen one day. I'm gonna try really, really hard to not bring my baggage into our relationship, though.
[ But even she knows that probably won't be possible. She's damaged. She'll probably have her not so stellar moments, but she'll try her best to make sure she handles it as well as she can. ]
We've both been through a lot, but...you have me, now. You won't have to deal with it alone.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Same here. I told my brother Barrett it feels like I won the lottery after connecting with you at the dunk tank.
[A little anecdote to further affirm that he isn't ashamed at all.]
I do want to tell Lucas while you're here, though. I was thinking...maybe having you there with me would help. Just so he doesn't think I'm being delusional.
[...]
If I said I had an online girlfriend he would have dismissed it outright. I know him.
no subject
[ She doesn't think of herself that highly, but it's nice to see him so happy with her.
As for that online girlfriend thing... ]
Heh, well, it's a good thing I'm actually here then, huh. Now I'm not just an online girlfriend. This is the real deal. I may have told Hani that I...
[ She blushes a bit, and glances at his jacket. ]
Well, I think my gift will say it all for me.
no subject
[A bashful little chuckle. He really does believe that, though. Of course, he used an incomprehensible analogy about rolling SSRs first and still likes that better, but this works too.
He lifts his head when Kara mentions the gift.]
Your...? Oh! I'm so sorry, I totally forgot about it!
[He reaches into his pocket to retrieve the little package. He looks at her with an excited smile before going ahead and opening it.]
no subject
[ And what Levi sees is a mixtape! It's a CD with a track list written on it in pink sharpie. There's also his name written on it at the top in purple.
Finally, there's a little signature at the bottom: A heart, and her name. ]
I... I'm kind of shy sometimes, so if you ever find yourself doubting how I feel, listen to this.
1/2
Kara, this is amazing! I love stuff like this. Thank you!!
[He starts to scan the track list.]
Heh, that's hard to imagine, though. You being shy, I mean.
[He studies the titles of the songs.]
no subject
It's a lot of normie music that he's not familiar with, but it doesn't take much to conclude that this is a whole lot of love songs.
His smile softens as he holds the CD close to his chest.]
I'm gonna give it a listen later tonight.
no subject
[ She can't help but bring her hand up to hide her face a little. She was so nervous about giving this to him, that hearing his approval makes her both relieved and excited for him to listen to it. ]
G-good! I was worried it'd be kind of lame... Do you know any of the songs on it?
And I'm kind of shy about this stuff, yeah. [ ... ] I'm not used to being so vulnerable.
no subject
...but now that he's in a relationship and receiving one made for him, he wonders if he only thought that because he was single and bitter about it. After all, he was convinced he'd never get something like this.]
Mmm... [He reviews the tracks.] I recognize some of the artists, but not the songs. Oh, I do think I heard "Call Me Maybe" once or twice, since you couldn't escape that song when it was mega popular. I never paid much attention to the lyrics aside from the chorus, though, so I'm looking forward to listening in another light.
[He almost continues his TL;DR, but Kara mentions being vulnerable and he can't help but pump the brakes on his playlist review.]
...
Is that why one of the songs is called "Terrified"?
no subject
[ She laughs a little bashfully, but at the mention of that particular song... ]
Yeah. I showed it to Hani, and they really liked it. I think they understood what I was trying to say about everything with it, so...
[ But that sounds kind of depressing, doesn't it? ]
Don't worry, though! It's a good song. It's not meant to be negative.
no subject
I'll pay special attention to that one, then. I wanna hear what you have to say through the songs you picked.
[He carefully sets the CD down on a side table and reaches for Kara's hand to hold.]
Still, I think I do get it at a glance. We've both been through...a lot, so entering this territory is pretty scary.
I'm not gonna take advantage of that. Of you.
no subject
I won't, either. I don't want to do that to you.
[ She might have, a couple of weeks ago, to someone else. Thankfully, Levi's helped her realize a few things about how flawed her way of thinking is. ]
If you ever want to talk about it, I'm here to listen, especially since I think there's a lot we don't know about each other, still. ... It'd be nice to learn as much about you as I can.
no subject
The air around Levi shifts. His kneejerk reaction is reluctance. He never wants to talk about this stuff, and he especially doesn't want to dump all his baggage on Kara. Still, he can't just not acknowledge her offer. It's coming from a good place, and she's right about how they still have a lot to learn about one another.
Though his eyes cloud over with something akin to brooding as he considers this, he's stroking his thumb against Kara's hand in the process.]
Maybe...not now. I don't wanna bring the mood down when you just got here.
no subject
Fair enough. We can talk about it some other time.
[ She leans in and up to plant her lips on his cheek. ]
Should we lay down?
no subject
I'd like that a lot.
[Letting go of her hand for the time being, he shifts so he can lie back and prop himself up against the guest room bed's many pillows. Kara's welcome to join him however she likes.
Once they're situated, though, Levi murmurs:]
Thanks for being willing to listen once the time's right.
no subject
Yeah, of course. I know you'll do the same for me, too.
[ Kara offers him a gentle smile in an attempt to lift his spirits a little. ]
You told me that you wanted me to be honest with you, through the good and bad, right? Then the same goes for you, too. Even if we, I don't know, get into a fight or something... I don't want to shut you out.
[ Like she has with so many people in the past. ]
no subject
I know it's wishful thinking to wanna believe we won't get into a fight, but...yeah, I think it's best to have this talk in case it does happen one day. I'm gonna try really, really hard to not bring my baggage into our relationship, though.
[Now that is the true wishful thinking.]
no subject
[ But even she knows that probably won't be possible. She's damaged. She'll probably have her not so stellar moments, but she'll try her best to make sure she handles it as well as she can. ]
We've both been through a lot, but...you have me, now. You won't have to deal with it alone.
I'll do everything I can to make you happy.
no subject
[She's said something similar to him, and he feels the exact same way.
He tips his head further to nuzzle against her.]
And the same goes for you, too. We'll support each other, like a top tier team. And we'll never be alone even when we're hours apart.
no subject
[ She softens and laughs when he nuzzles her. She gently cups his cheek, and leans in to press a gentle kiss to his lips. ]
You're right. Even if it's three in the morning, you're free to call me. I want to be here for you.
[ Especially after hearing about what he's been through. ]
I brought over some homework, by the way. Lame, I know, but I thought we could have one of those study dates I promised...?
no subject
Same here. [...] Though I guess that's not as weighty when I'm always up at three in the morning. Eight in the morning, then.
[Help.
He feigns a little disappointment to have homework brought up.]
Ew. Lame doesn't even begin to describe it. [His lips quirk into a smile.] But I like the sound of that. A date's a date, right?
no subject
[ She laughs and kisses the corner of his smile. Honestly, she's enamored. It's written all over her face. ]
So...help me with my math? Whenever we study!